Sunday, June 14, 2009

The Agnostic Christian

This is a poem that I will be reading for Intersections of Art and Faith-An Open-Mic Reading and Discussion Series. It will be read on the final night in August.

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The Agnostic Christian



Will I believe it when I see it?

or will i see it when I choose to believe it?

Does one have a choice in these games,

or are we all subjected to the dictations of the cosmos?


"God does not care for you" you claim

However, my neighbor, my heart

puts up the claim of a different narrative

(am I to privilege that which I do not see{believe}?)


the pumping of blood bids me closer to the source;

the ravings of insanity lurk behind these eyes


Who is it that lies behind these eyes?


where does the surge of plasma come from

that compels me towards the center of what I do not believe?


Lurk around the corner, dear stranger,

I will not hear the taunts until I am too late

We are all to late to understand what may draw us away...

away from a journey so grand and beautiful


Not behind these eyes,

the taunting voice does not cry from

But from the well spring of life

does the great travesty's voice arise


(do the dictations of the cosmos

come from our own two eyes?)


lust, power, greed


the cry for more compels me away

from that which I do not believe

away from the essence of all we can know

(beauty)


What more could I wish for

then what i believe?

What lies in front of these eyes...

the 'beauty'(deficient)

only cries for comfort and security

separation from what lies behind your eyes:

within the well spring of your life


if only I can become but a child again

even travel back beyond the womb,

to experience that which I do not believe

to feel again the source of this life

that can only belong to the one in whom I fail to perceive

(in whom I can only believe)


Do I bid farewell?

Shall I remain subject to the workings of the cosmos?

Destiny will, and will forever be yours and mine


This wellspring I offer up


{Restore us to yourself, O Lord, that we

may be restored;

renew our days as of old-

unless you have utterly rejected us,

and are angry with us beyond

measure}



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